Absence

Illustration of a little girl's boots by Hannah Foley. All rights reserved (www.owlingabout.co.uk).I’m going away for two weeks. Outrageous, I hear you cry! Surely there’s washing to be done and vegetables to puree? Well yes, there is, but I’m leaving Big Dreamer in charge. Not for the whole two weeks. That would be madness. He’d never survive. I’m coming back after one and then we’ll all be away. I’m slightly nervous what shape the house and the children will be in by the end of that first week but as long as they’re clothed, fed and a red sock hasn’t been put in with the whites I’ll be satisfied.

I joke of course. What will actually happen is that they will all have the time of their lives. That’s what Dad’s do best isn’t it? Or at least Big Dreamer does. He rocks up, plays all sorts of wild imaginative games, meanwhile ignoring the everyday functions of the house, and everyone has a ball. Nevermind that no one will have any clean pants to wear the week after. Who needs clean pants when you can pretend your Dad is a tiger chasing you through a jungle, who can only be stopped by being pelted with segments of satsuma?

Just where do you think you’re going anyway, I hear you shout. I’m going on a course. Yes, a residential course, where I will be away and Internet is banned. Very exciting. You have to roll the ‘r’ in that ‘very’ to get the full benefit. Don’t worry I’ll fill you in when I get back…for now I’m just quite nervous. Then we’ll be heading south for my little niece’s christening. Hilarious moments are obligatory at christenings so I’ll return with some of those to regale you with too. See you soon!

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