One of the ironies of this magnificent country Scotland is that it is mostly cold and windy, then when the sun shines the midgies come out. If you haven’t heard of these nasty biting insects I can’t convey in words the horror of finding yourself in a swarm of them. Much, much worse than mosquitoes. Evenings are their favourite time to feast, hence Big Dreamer and I were watching the sun go down over the valley from the lounge window.

Suddenly there was a loud ping and a strange bug appeared on the outside of the window pane. What a funny little creature, we declared. We watched him for a while, poddling over the glass, antennae waving. We thought he was sweet and full of character. I’ll look him up, said I. This is what I read:

“Black Vine Weevil. The adult vine weevil is a pest in the greenhouse or on pot plants: it eats the edges of leaves leaving semi-circular notches. It feeds at night and is difficult to detect, as it drops off and plays dead if the plant is disturbed. However, it is the larva that does the most harm, feeding on roots and tubers underground until the plant is unable to take up water and collapses.”

UNTIL THE PLANT IS UNABLE TO TAKE UP WATER AND COLLAPSES!!! And it was poddling about directly above my tubs of peas. Urgent action was required. Like a complete hypocrite I hid in the kitchen while Big Dreamer did the deed.

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